I am well aware of a flaw in my critique ability. I am more prone to brutal honesty that lies in a not so comfortable fashion for most individuals. I will cuss. I will threaten to throw books – not that I ever would. Drywall is a pain in the butt to fix.

So, for now, until needed, I will be running a section in my blog called Roast My Book. This is in conjunction with my book review series I have set up. If this expands beyond the scope of my current website, I will move this to it’s own location at a later point in time.

The main premise of this came from a twitter post I created that went something like this:

Deeply contemplating starting up a blog named Roast My Book. A place for long winded rant like reviews of stories with ingrained flaws of sexism, racism, homophobia, badly handled tropes, logic and plot holes. Angry book reviews. That’s me.


There you have it. A few rules though, with regard to Roast My Book reviews.

  1. If I cannot readily walk into a B&N and purchase your book directly off the shelf, but instead must order it through a catalogue or online (small press, indie press, self published) you must be the one to request your book be Roasted. I will screenshot that request and include it in my Roast. I refuse to Roast a small or little reviewed book by someone else asking outside of the author. I am brutally honest, and if you are not mentally prepared or willing to have your story entirely shredded, fleshed out, and spoiled, I will not Roast it. That is cruel and unusual and not good for people to have happen to them suddenly and without warning.
  2. If I cannot obtain a physical copy, I will not Roast it – this is because I find it difficult to read books on screens due to AVM/seizures. This means, if the book is only in an ebook format, a guest reviewer will need to be retained for the article. I will set up an Amazon wishlist where, if you wish to have me review your physical copy of your book, you can send it to me through that, let me know the title, I’ll put it in the wishlist, there are buttons for purchasing and mailing it, easy to work out over a twitter DM. I like my privacy, you probably do to, so I don’t do the whole address share thing. I am not made of money and am not getting paid by the author, publisher, agent, or editor for reviewing the material other than being sent a book.
  3. I will Amazon link your book in the Roast. It’s probably going to be the only way I actually might make any money doing this, seeing as I probably won’t be able to adsense this. I like cussing, most ad companies do not.
  4. I do not put these reviews on Goodreads or Amazon. These are for people who want the Angry Cliff Notes version, not a way to completely screw someone’s algorithms, analytics, and profit margin. I realize that bad reviews can ruin a person’s day, but can also ruin a person’s career. I want to do neither of these things while still explaining why utilizing a certain stereotype is really racist/sexist/homophobic/ageist/ableist/etc.
  5. I am not qualified to sensitivity read all subjects. I am middle-class, white, pansexual, genderfluid, AFAB, stroke survivor, have focal seizures, have an AVM, have a failed tubal ligation, have had miscarriages, have gone through divorce. These are topics I would be willing to Roast that also require a sensitivity reader. If I am asked to Roast a book with sensitivity reader needs and I get into it and feel that I cannot do it proper justice, I will reach out with the author’s permission to request another reviewer who can provide a proper breakdown.
  6. I will take guest reviews of books as long as the book is either famous enough you can get it at a bookstore easily, or the guest reviewer can provide proof that they were given permission to Roast the book by the author. I will read over the guest review. I retain the right to not post the review if I find it to not fit within a certain set of standards, or I find it harmful over all – i.e. don’t send me stuff to hate bash on someone for vindictive reasons. No one wants to read that level of malice.
  7. There will be chapter breakdowns, quotes, and spoilers.

The Roast Rant Reviews:

I am a writer and artist working through the Kavordian Library series. I write sci-fi, fantasy, lgbt romance.

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